Feeling around in the Dark

Here I am back on my blog, coffee in hand and NOT late at night.

I believe tech has beaten my.  It’s made me addicted and flogged the living crud outta me.  I go a while not able to check something and I’m twitching like I’ve got a bad habit.  I get upset beyond upset when I can’t find my laptop case or the memory stick with my life’s work on it.  How has this come to be?  I can’t even master my smart phone (which I think they call it that because it’s smarter than me).  I can be perfectly fine with my most recent editing of the next book I’m working on, red ink all over the page all so I can type it up later……on tech.  Maybe I’m just stubborn, maybe I’m too reliant yet in denial?

No matter what…..you can find me on the floor looking like a turtle on its’s back.  It’s kicked me and won.  Facebook author page…..yay fans but heck if nobody interacts that goes down the tubes.  Fail.  How do I fix, who the heck knows, not me.  I have no money, starving artist remember?  Twitter, I STILL don’t know how to figure that one out.  Strictly business or a little bit of fun stuff in there?  I never understood twitter, but hey there are fans…..once again no interaction.  I swear I have electronic cooties.

Amazon, smashwords, goodreads (and that place is a minefield of confusion let me tell you that, plus so many books to catch up on), and oh crap I forgot there was a Tumblr I started ONLY about the books that changed or influenced my life.  Oops.  And an about.me.  Now that’s been updated, whew; fixed. Where in the word am I supposed to have that much time for it?  For someone who is so self-conscious seems to really be busy messing around in things she doesn’t know all too well.  Mama bird threw me outta the nest with no concrete instructions.  I like instructions. I like formats. Organization, all that.  I like people. Not one sided conversations of course.

Living in the deep south, well that doesn’t help at all.  Not for what I do, or what I write.  Pretty genre specific and the young adult world has taken it by storm.  That’s the problem.  Thank you friggin young adult.  It’s everywhere and no matter how much people probably think it should be young adult, adult situations happen in what I write.  It happens, I can’t change that.  so I get a choice of hanging out with a bunch of twi-hards, That’s a no-go for me.  I read the original Vampire Diaries, when I was a teen.  That was much better before it became a t.v. show and made it big.  And the YA seems to have claimed it as new and all their all. HA SUCKERS BEAT YOU TO IT!!!! There aren’t many independent bookstores let alone ones that cater to my special needs. Writer’s groups?  Um, the only one local is Romance.  Now I admit there is some in there, but its not written from a point of view that mean I have to have the tag Romance Writers of America sticker stuck to my name.  Those workshop, table reads, are the most awkward. Oh but it would be wonderful to find just the right kind of coffee shop or back street bookstore or something for the occult (no that’s not a scary word, it really isn’t) where my book can sit on its shelves or I can talk with ones who are like me; stuck.  Coffee, reading (even as a speaker, now that would be awesome), discussing, and just enjoying other people with my same interests in the written world.  Radio time would be great, of course my physical copy would be good to pedal my wares and that is coming very soon.  Once that proof is in my hands I’m golden on that aspect.  But where in the world would I go? Who would I talk to? Good ol’ Confederates still live here so that doesn’t happen here. *sigh*  Oh well right? Soooooooo……

Back to online media.  Woohoo. Fail. Fail. Fail.  Oh wait there’s a little bit of something, but mostly fail.  I can’t work it properly.  I so wish I could hire someone to do it for me. Or even beg and plead to get it done. I’m all good with the barter system, just somebody take over for me before I turn the whole thing into a train-wreck.  

I’m not negative, don’t take me the wrong way. I’m a realist. So none of it is a shock.  I just think that if people would just slow down and really pay attention things would get done a bit better.  Too many 0’s and 1’s stuck in their brain’s they don’t know how to do anything else. I can’t accept that.  I won’t accept that.  Big old shot of adrenaline maybe I can jump right in there.  It’s the double dutch jump rope of life quite possibly; watch the ropes, wait for the right time, jump right in and try to keep up.  Isn’t that what we all have to do from time to time?

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